Wednesday, June 12, 2013

Order Me This, Please!

What I can't stand is when a customer wants us to order something, and then when we do finally get the item in, they disappear and never come back and we are now stuck with that item.

And it's usually an item that will NEVER sell.

Most of the time it's some off-the-wall brand of expensive cigarette that only men in their 70s still smoke. It's usually "Order me 3 cartons a week! I'll be in to buy them!" Against my better judgement, I order them, and that's when the customer suddenly decides to stop smoking. Or dies. Or just disappears, never to be heard from again.

And the obvious solution would be to return the cigarettes to the place we ordered it from, but they don't take returns on cigarettes just because a customer didn't want them anymore.

So then those cigarettes sit there. And no matter how hard we try to sell them to customers, no one wants them because usually they are $10 a pack or some insane amount. And as they sit there, they go stale. And we end up having to get rid of them because after 5 years of sitting on the shelves, they would probably turn to dust if someone squeeze the pack.

So this is why I don't order items when customers say they want us to carry something. And now, when someone wants a strange pack of cigarettes, I usually make them prepay for the carton now. 

Thursday, June 6, 2013

Product Review: Neuro-Bliss

I decided to review Neuro-Bliss for the sole reason that there is 'Happiness in Every Bottle' and I definitely need that. A few years ago I tried Neuro-Sleep but I don't think I ever posted a review on it. It must not have been that memorable. Or maybe it made me so sleepy that I forgot I drank it.

Anyways, Neuro-Bliss is supposed to de-stress my life. If one drink can take away the shitty and mean customers, then order me a pallet!

I decided to drink this before I went to work, figuring that if I did get yelled at by someone, then I'd let all of the negativity roll off of me and have a nice day.

I was all excited for this drink, so I chugged half of it until I realized it tasted like 7-Up. I'm not a fan of 7-Up, but I decided to drink the rest anyway because I really really wanted to be happy.

I guess I was expecting to watch the clouds part as the sun shined through and rainbows appear in the sky, but that didn't happen and I didn't feel any effects from it. When I got to work I immediately got yelled at by a customer because the bathroom was out of order. Okay, whatever, if that's the worst that can happen, fine by me.

Then a bunch of kids came in and spilled slushie all over the floor, so I went and got the mop and didn't say a word when I had to clean it all up.

After that a customer told me I shorted him $20. I politely told him he'd have to wait for the manager the next day to check the video footage. He told me I needed to go back to school and learn to add.

By this time I was guessing that I'd jinxed myself by drinking this Neuro-Bliss. I wanted so much to be happy and to feel like I was frolicking in a field of flowers, but that wasn't happening.

When I got into an argument with my co-worker about which one of us was going to clean up the puke at Pump #7, I gave up on this drink.

Fuck you, Neuro-Bliss. My day was shittier because of you! Maybe I need Neuro-Gasm to relax me a little. But I don't think they make that anymore.

Has this drink worked for anyone else out there? Did it give you the happiness it promised?

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