Saturday, November 26, 2011

Cashier's Thoughts

I don't know about anyone else that works in retail, but sometimes I wonder how many murderers I ring up in a day.

Seriously, how would I know if some guy just killed his wife and came in to buy cigarettes from me?

I see at least 500 people a day, there's bound to be a murderer somewhere in there, right?

And I don't mean the crazies, like this guy:

or this guy:

I'm talking about the strange ones...the ones that don't look you in the eye, the ones that are very quiet...the ones that just buy their shit and get the hell out. Those are the ones that I watch out for. We have a few of those types in the store.

I'm expecting one of them to come in one day covered in blood and wanting a pack of Lucky Strikes, breathing heavily from the adrenaline rush they got from stabbing someone 71 times.

If that ever happens, then I'm out of there for good.

I can feel something strange is going to happen soon. Is there a full moon coming? I'd better put some foil on to protect myself like that guy above. Maybe he has the right idea.


  1. You do have a gun behind the counter, right? Have you been "flashed" yet? When I worked retail, I got flashed by both genders. Veeery interesting.

  2. Those were my favorite kind of customers. I wish everyone could've just gotten their shit and got out of my damn face instead of standing there making moronic comments or taking 5 minutes to decide which lottery ticket they want.

  3. i work in a gas station over night and we have a regular customer who is always polite but also always in a hurry and i go out of my way to make sure he's in an out as fast as possible. its a running joke with my coworkers that we have no idea what he's in a hurry for and can we be held responsible if we're helping him be on time to kill someone or sell drugs or rob someone somewhere, you just never know!

  4. When I worked at a truckstop and at a convenience store that thought crossed my mind, too. I wondered what some of these people were going to do after they left the store, or what they were doing before they came in. The money they just paid me with could've been money they just stole from a bank for all I know and they could be on their way to a murdering spree. I was watching the news one night and a lady had been killed and these two other ladies had stolen her car and stopped at one of the stores in the area I worked in. They could've come to my register for all I knew. It's strange.

  5. i work at a motel - a "budget class" motel - I have rented to people that I have later seen in the paper being arrested/convicted for murder. The scary thing - They are just like everyone else - friendly even. scares the crap out of me.

  6. I once had a woman with a sticker over her name on the Air Miles card, and when I commented on it she said she didn't want her name "announced" out loud, which is what we do at Safeway, we thank by name... Seriously was it Bin Laden or something?



Design by Custom Blog Designs using stock image by lemn