We used to get a lot of counterfeit money, but not so much anymore. But we do constantly check big bills to see if they are real.
For some reason, people get all defensive when we check their money. Why is that?
When I am handed a $50 or $100 bill, I will pull out our counterfeit detector pen, which looks like this:
For some reason, the people that give me problems about checking their money usually look like this:
Which means they could probably kick the shit out of me if I find out it's a fake bill.
So with trembling hands I usually check their money and am praying to the cashier gods that it comes out okay.
But most of the time I get middle-aged men that come in and give me a problem. When I pull out my pen, they will usually say something like, "Uhh, it's real. You don't need to be doing that." or "It's not fake, I just got it from the bank."
So-fucking-what if you got it from the bank, sometimes they give out counterfeit money too! Just because you're going through a mid-life crisis and have to act all manly with your $100 bill doesn't mean you have to give me shit about it.
However, I have to confess that I love it when the money comes up fake because these people get all freaked out.
I can always tell if they already knew it was fake, but most of the time they had no clue. So they will get worried and I will go on to tell them that I have to call the police and that the FBI will probably be involved.
This just scares them even more. Yeah yeah, I'm horrible. Whatever. I need to brighten my day somehow, right?
So this is why you should never question anything your local cashier does. He or she could easily hand you back your change, which could contain a counterfeit bill and then YOU would be the one stuck with it.