Forcing a Donation

What NOT to do when you're a cashier at a clothing store:

Cashier: Your total is $19.90. Would you like to make a donation to St. Jude's Hospital?

Customer: No, that's okay.

Cashier: You don't want to donate even a dollar?

Customer: No.

Cashier: What about rounding your total up to $20.00? That's only a 10 cent donation.

Customer: I said no.


Yes, this happened; a cashier pushing a customer to donate. I'm glad we don't do this shit at my store. And that cashier is also lucky that she wasn't ringing ME up that day. My sister was the customer and is always too nice to say anything when stuff like this happens. So when she tells me I'm usually the one that gets fired up and complains.

This cashier was also a complete bitch to my sister regarding some promotion that was going on.

Listen, I get it. Customers are assholes around this time of year. But forget all that, why try and make someone feel bad because they don't want to donate their money? My sister walked out of that store feeling like a bad person because she didn't donate anything, but she didn't WANT to donate because of the attitude of this cashier.

So yes, I will be calling the manager or going to see the manager in the store and complaining about this lady. It doesn't matter that it was my sister. If I had been in line and heard her doing this to someone else, I would have said something too.

Please, all cashiers out there, don't do this. No one has to donate any of their hard earned money. And for all you know, they may donate their money somewhere else. Or they may be having a rough time right now and can't afford to give. Not even 10 cents.

Has anyone ever had this happen to them before?

New Look for the Cashier

So I decided that it was time for a new look, especially since I'm working on getting Confessions of a Cashier published sometime soon.

So here it is and I love it. What do you think of it?

I'd like to thank Diana at Custom Blog Designs for giving me exactly what I wanted.

A happy cashier means I won't take it out on my customers!

So if you're looking for a new blog design, send her a message. She's great to work with. (Unlike my fellow co-workers who have been calling off this week and pissing me off.)

Thanks again, Diana.

Doughnut Be Stupid

Sometimes I just want to smack a customer's hand and tell them 'No!'

No, you cannot rip a doughnut in half and ask if you can have it for half price.

Yes, that is what a customer did yesterday. I would have thought he'd bust out with a 'Just kidding!' and run back to grab the other half of the doughnut, but no. He was serious.

When I told him that he couldn't have it for half price, he walked back over to the doughnut case, put the half doughnut back and walked out of the store.

Wow, times must be tough if you can't afford a 75 cent luxury.

I didn't have the energy to run after him. Instead all I could do was shake my head.

If I ever see him in the store again, I'm going to add 75 cents to his total.

But an assface like that probably knows not to come back.

Loafing Around

While this is semi-old news, I'm still going to talk about it.

Twinkies.

Are they gone for good? Who knows. But I DO know that everyone was racing out to get them once the story hit the news. We sold out of Twinkies and Wonder bread that same night.

So now that we were out of bread, we had to look for another supplier. So we decided to go with Nickles bread. Mainly because the truck had stopped at our store to get gas.

Now we have Nickles bread and I'm not sure how I feel about that. Why? Because the delivery guy was a dick when he first came into our store.

He had looked at our bread display, which is quite measly but that's because we don't focus primarily on bread to make a living.

Then he told us that we needed to sell a minimum of $50 a week for him to even consider our store. He told us it wouldn't be worth his time.

What?

So now that they are the major bread place around here they are now being picky? I don't get it. Even a store doing half of that would still be business.

And he stops at our store to get gas all the time so we can't be THAT far out of his way.

Just for the fact that he said that makes me want to tell him to go away.

But we need bread. Our customers need something to absorb all that alcohol in their stomachs.

Let's hope that Twinkies and Wonder bread come back soon.

Was anyone saddened by the demise of the Twinkie?

Changing

I couldn't take the look of this site anymore so I had to change it. Even though this one is extremely basic, it's here for now until I have a few minutes to find something I like. Although some of the templates out there are pretty shitty.

So because I am changing things around, I'm going to leave you with the best.sign.ever.

Customers Stealing Employees

Hope everyone had a good Thanksgiving!

As usual, pretty much every customer told us how much it sucked that we had to work on Thanksgiving. As if we didn't already know!

One of the customers even got kicked out of the store, but he deserved it in my opinion.

If there's one thing I hate, it's people that try to steal our employees and get them to work for them instead. There's this guy that's been coming in for about 3 months now and when he first came in, he zeroed in on one of our new hires and would bring her applications all the time to various other stores. I don't even think he worked at any of those stores, he just thought he would help her out I guess.  Well now that girl doesn't work for us anymore. I have no idea if she went to work for this guy or not. All I know is that she gave us a ten-minute notice that she was quitting.

Now this guy has been coming in and chatting it up with our night shift girl. As people that run 24-hour businesses know, it is extremely difficult to find good help for night shift. They have to be trustworthy and show up on time. We've had the same night shift girl for about 15 or 20 years now. She's reliable and doesn't steal shit from us. Good enough for me. Well now this asshole customer has been trying to get her to go somewhere else.

So today he was told not to come in the store anymore. When he asked why, it was explained to him that he needs to leave our employees alone and to stop getting them to work somewhere else.

He replied angrily that he worked in construction now anyways and that he didn't need them.

The other part of this is that he's pretty creepy and always stares inappropriately at the girls that work there.

So hopefully this dickhead will stay out of the store. I hate losing employees to customers. We've lost some pretty good ones over the years.

Hurricane Business

So the past few days we've been getting extremely bad weather here - remnants of Hurricane Sandy. Or Superstorm Sandy, as they called it here.

Normally most people would stay in and ride out the storm, but not our customers.

It was extremely important for our old customers to come out in their huge cars that they can't see out of just to get the newspaper. They risked their lives and other people's lives just for a 75 cent newspaper. But that's no surprise I guess since they come out in snowstorms to read the freaking paper.

We also had people calling us - our phones worked but our power was out - and asking us if our lottery machines were working. Seriously? These people were concerned about playing their lottery numbers than worrying about whether or not the roof was going to rip off of their house!

The one thing that shocked me, though, was that we sold out of batteries. And condoms. Batteries and condoms! I get the batteries for flash lights and stuff (or maybe vibrators), but condoms?

I guess when the power is out there really is nothing else do to.

A Plethera of Thieves

No one believes me here at work when I say this area is getting worse.

Yet another thief the other day. It makes me wonder how much people DO steal and we only catch the idiots that aren't smart enough to hide it.

This one walked in and went over to the energy drinks right away. He was standing there for awhile and doing the usual glancing-up-at-the-counter-to-see-if-anyone-is-watching stare. Naturally I was watching on the monitor. Sometimes the monitor doesn't show things clearly, though. I thought I saw him shove something down his pants but I wasn't sure.

While I was debating on what to do, he walked out of the store.

Lucky for me he was in a car with three other guys and lucky for me the reason they had pulled into the parking lot in the first place was because they saw a cute girl pumping gas and probably wanted to harass her. While she was inside paying, they were all waiting for her to come back out which gave me time to look up the video and see that yes, indeed, he had shoved a Monster energy drink down his pants. Asshole.

So I go outside and walk up to their car. These four guys looked like complete trash. I needed to take a shower just from looking at them. The one that stole was sitting in the back seat.

I knocked on his window. "You owe me $4."

"For what?" he yelled through the closed window.

"The drink you stole. Either that or I can call the cops."

He started shuffling around inside his pants. It honestly looked like he was masturbating. I wouldn't have been surprised if he was, with the kind of people we've been getting around here.

After a few seconds he produced the Monster energy drink and passed it to the driver to hand to me.

I backed away. "I don't want it, that's been in your pants. Who knows what kind of diseases are on it now." His friends started snickering.

"Well I don't have any money for it," he yelled.

"That's fine, I'll call the cops," I said as I started to walk away.

"Wait!" he yelled. I walked back over and the four guys all started ruffling around in their pants, on the floor, in the glove compartment and in the middle console. Group orgy.

After about a minute they all pooled their various bills and change together and dumped all of it into my outstretched hand.

"Don't ever come in here anymore or I'll call the police and post your pictures at the register," I said as I walked away.

Chasing after $4 energy drinks, come on. At least steal milk and bread. I won't come after you then.

Quitting Employees

My coworkers seem to be dropping like flies lately.

We just had two people quit and another one has walking pneumonia. As for the two that quit, neither of them gave their two weeks notice. I understand that it's a gas station and we see a lot of turnover, but still. Act like a fucking adult and give us time to find someone else to replace your lazy ass. One of them, who is about 45 years old, said she couldn't live off of what she was making at our store. Yet, that didn't seem to bother her when she was told what she was going to start at. Maybe it's the fact that she buys two cases of beer every night as well as a carton of cigarettes every two days. Could that be why she can't afford to live off of what she makes?

We figure that she's a job hopper, and just goes from job to job because she gets bored. Nice example to set for her kids.

The other one that quit was the one that had her car stolen in our parking lot about a month ago. She said that she had a family emergency and couldn't work for us anymore. This one was about to get fired anyways because she had been doing absolutely nothing for the past few weeks.

I think she was wanting us to fire her so she didn't have to quit.

I'll never understand why people do this. I have seen it so many times over the years. People will just stop working once they show up for their shifts. It's always obvious that they are about to quit. Why not just quit and get it over with? It's not like these assholes give two weeks notice, they just stop doing anything for two weeks and finally call a few minutes before their shift and quit.

All I hear all the time are people bitching about how they need more hours because they need the money. The ones that complain the loudest about this are the ones that are always the first to go once we give them the hours they want.

I don't know, I'm just sick of people again I guess.

And now that the holidays are coming up, customers are going to be shitfaces to us too. Happy holidays to me!

First Time for Everything

Well, it finally happened.

One of my co-workers got her car stolen while at work.

There's a church next door to our store and we mostly park in their parking lot during work.  We've never had a problem with anyone messing with our cars. Until now.

I was working the other day with my co-worker Sarah. She's a young college student working at our store part-time while going to school full-time.

She worked with me until noon on our last shift together. After we did shift change, she left for the day. Shortly after, she came back in with a funny look on her face.

"What's wrong?" I asked. I figured a customer had pissed her off or something.

"My car's gone," she said quietly.

"What? Your car is gone?" I said while peering out into the parking lot to look for her car.

"I parked it next to your car this morning when I came into work. It's not there now," she said, slowly starting to panic. "I already called the police. Is it okay if I wait here for them to arrive?"

"Yeah," I said while heading outside. I guess I had to see for myself that her car was gone. I walked to the parking lot and stood next to my car. Yep, sure enough, big empty parking spot next to my car.

So naturally I came inside to look it up on camera to see if I could find anything.

After much searching, the person who stole her car was a customer that I had rung up. I had never seen him before, but I did mention after he left our store that he looked kind of shady. I must have sensed that he was up to no good. He bought a lighter but kept talking to himself while I was ringing him up. While that's the normal around here, I still found him to be strange.

After he left our store, he walked right next door to the parking lot and got right into her car like it was his. No hesitation, nothing. Which caused me to ask Sarah if she had locked her car doors. And of course she hadn't. But he somehow hotwired the car to get it to start and then drove away with it.

All of this had happened at 8:30am. She didn't notice her car was gone until after her shift at 12 noon. I figured he was on his way to Mexico by now with her car.

Much much later, the police finally showed up. First thing he asked Sarah was if she was caught up on payments for her car. (Thinking it had been repo'd I guess.)

I ended up going home that day a few hours later, but I called up to the store to see if they had found her car.

Apparently this guy stole her car and drove it across the street to a strip of stores. He parked it behind the building and ended up stealing her car stereo and all the clothes she had in her car. Other than that, no other damage was done.

Still, this asshole had taken her car from a church parking lot. Is nothing sacred any more???

I wish there was a device that would automatically pepper spray someone once they started messing with wires or something inside of a car. But then a lot of mechanics would run around with burning eyes.

I always lock my car doors. I don't trust anyone. But now I'm extra sure I keep my car parked in a spot that is visible to me at all times. Fuck these assholes with no jobs that go around stealing other people's stuff.

I'm Not Alone...

As you can see, I am not the only cashier that does little things to get my revenge. Here is a recent comment by Anonymous:

Anonymous has left a new comment on your post "Little Things I Do To Get My Revenge":

I work at a supermarket. I get terribly rude customers all the time. I once had a lady literally snatch her receipt out of my hand, I was polite and I had done nothing wrong. I have had a customer say "Oh I forgot something, I'll quickly go get it." She came back 15 minutes later. I have customers who are on the phone and don't say anything to me and get annoyed when I have to tell them the total of their purchase, extremely rude. I have customers say to me "I'm in a hurry, please be fast". or "I have a doctors appointment in 5 minutes, can you hurry?" No! It's your own fault for not a)shopping fast enough, or b) being late! So when I get pissed off at work (which is a lot of the time) I tend to do things.

1) I squish their bread as I 'gently' place it in their bag.
2) If they are buying tofu, it gets squished.
3) The cap of the milk is slightly opened.
4) I overpack bags (Our bags keep getting thinner).
5) I don't ask if they would like the beef or other meat separate from the rest of their food (We have to ask, I've had a lady yell at me for not asking when I did, she wasn't listening)
6) I take as long as possible to put through their payment.
7) if you give me a large note (say a $100 note) and you only spend $45.15, I will give you back 3 $10 notes, 2 $5notes, 2 $2 coins, 1 $1 coin, a 20cent coin, 6 10cent coins and a 5cent piece. And then i will say, in a sickly sweet voice, "Sorry about the small change" and smile.

So really, don't be rude to us. We are nice people and we have done nothing wrong to you, yet, so if you are polite to us, we will be polite to you.
Stuff not to do:
1) Instructing us how to pack bags is not nice. We know how to pack bags, we work at a supermarket.
2)Don't give me your green bags after I have packed half your stuff in plastic (Plastic bags are free in our store). I will not repack what I have already packed.
3)If you have two small items and the person behind you has many items, DO NOT hold your two items, because I will assume you are both together and start on the large transaction (because I don't see your items). So don't get mad at me for that.
4)You can start unpacking your load when there is a metre gap between your items and the person in front of you, I can see where theirs stops, I'm not an idiot. And unpacking all your stuff once i have put through their payment, are you trying to hold up the whole store?
5) Shove your Flybuys (or other rewards card) under my nose throughout the whole transaction, as you can probably see I am busy, half the time both hands are literally full. I will put it through at the end, calm down.
6) If you swipe your own Flybuys (or rewards card) and LITERALLY SMACK MY HAND OUT OF THE WAY, I will be pissed off, and that is putting it lightly. Can you be any ruder? I mean really? Are you that impatient? Do you like hitting 18 year old girls? Don't be a dickhead, you think it saves time, but it just gets us mad.

I get mad, yes, but is it warranted? Yes.
Be nice to cashiers and we will be nice to you.
I'm polite and courteous to everyone who comes through my checkout. But if you are rude or treat me badly, things will happen to your food.. 

At least I know I'm not the only one out there! I think I should start a Cashiers Anonymous group so we can all vent our frustrations. I could pass out packages of Little Debbie snack cakes so we can all practice squeezing them.

Tell Me What You REALLY Think...

I received this comment the other day on my "Little Things I Do to Get My Revenge" post. 

Anonymous said...

    I am sure you enjoy little acts of revenge, but at the end of the day the real issue is that you are working in a convenience store. Maybe you should get some more education and seek more satisfying employment elsewhere.

Why does everyone assume that someone working in a convenience store has little to no education? Times are tough out there and not many people are hiring for any type of job. When we DO hire, we get applications where there are WAY too many people with years and years of professional experience in their field, yet they just can't seem to make ends meet and are looking for a second job to help out with some of the bills.

Also, wouldn't working in a convenience store be better than some of these assholes that don't have a job at all? There are people that live off the government or scam them, yet it's okay because at least they aren't working in a convenience store? So it would be okay if I sat on the side of the road scratching my crotch all day instead of working in a *gasp* convenience store?

Don't assume anything about anyone, Anonymous. Where a person works should not matter who they are or what you may think of them. But it seems that you like to judge people on what type of job they have.

I graduated from college 10 years ago. (jesus, has it been that long?)

I am a published author with my second book coming out next month.

I happen to work where I do because it is my family's business. Sure, some customers suck, but I like working with my family. And not all customers are bad. Like I said, they've been behaving themselves lately so I've been extremely bored at work.

Why do I write this blog? Because there are a lot of people that can relate to what I go through with customers and they like to read about it.

So Anonymous, don't assume someone needs more education or that they need to find more life fulfilling work just because they work at a convenience store. Everyone has to work and not everyone likes their jobs but they do it anyways. It's called "Work" for a reason. That's why people say they hate getting up for "Work" and not that they hate getting up for "Fun"!

 

Lying Scumbag Thieves...Is There Any Other Kind?

Sorry I've been MIA, been real busy and customers haven't actually been too bad lately.

I was just saying that to someone the other day, which of course means I jinxed myself.

I was working the other day when I had to go up front to help get rid of the line that had formed. My coworker was ringing up a guy's purchase and his card kept declining.

I wasn't too sure what was going on but I saw the customer grab his bag and walk to the back of the store.

"Did he pay for that?" I asked my coworker.

"No, his card declined. He said he'd put the items back himself."

Now, I hate when customers do this. Usually when they don't want their purchase I will tell them I'll put the items back. Why? Because some of them steal the items that they can't afford to pay for.

So my coworker started watching him put the items back on the little monitor we have up front. The customer put whatever he bought back in the cooler and leaves the store. Shortly after that, my coworker walks from behind the register saying "He didn't put the nail clippers back," and she follows him out the door.

So I figured she'd go confront him, that's what I usually do unless they scare the hell out of me. This was a guy about 25 years old. I would have went out and said something to him.

My coworker is gone for about ten seconds when she comes back in and yells out a license plate to me. Now, we train them to get the license plate of people that steal or drive off with gas, but I'm thinking "Really? I'm not calling the cops to chase after a guy for $1.49."

So I go outside instead. In my hand I had a piece of paper where I had written down his license plate when she yelled it out to me.

I stop him while he's pulling out of his parking spot. He rolls down his window.

"Where are the nail clippers?" I ask.

"I put them back."

"I don't see them. Where did you put them?"

"I put them where they belong," he says, slightly agitated.

"No you didn't, you just put back the Red Bull. You didn't go anywhere near the other shelves. Did you put them in your pocket?"

"No!" he yells. "I put them somewhere, I just threw them on a shelf!" He was getting really pissed.

"Fine," I said. "If I can't find them I'm giving your license plate number to the police," I said and stormed inside.

I hadn't wanted to press the issue too far because

A) They were just nail clippers and

B) I hadn't yet checked out the security video and was just going on the word of my coworker, which can sometimes be wrong.

But, I don't care that he had just stolen something that was only $1.49, it's the point that I don't want this fuckface in my store because if he steals something small the first time and gets away with it, he'll steal more each time he comes in.

So I went back inside and about an hour later looked up the security video. Sure enough, he put back his Red Bulls in the cooler and you could see him stick something in his pocket, which could only have been the nail clippers.

Naturally, I wasn't going to call the cops for $1.49 so I just decided we had to let it go.

I was doing paperwork in the back room about an hour later when my coworker called me up front. There she was, ringing up the thief that had stolen the nail clippers. She was ringing him up for a pair of NAIL CLIPPERS!

"He said he forgot that they were in his pocket," my coworker said.

I looked at him and he smiled at me sheepishly. "You forgot that you put them in your pocket? Even after I asked you about them in your car?"

"Yeah," he said. "I'm embarrassed. I forgot they were in there." Then he smiled at me while his face turned red.

So I told him that he wasn't allowed in the store anymore and that I didn't want any thieves around here. He agreed, paid for the nail clippers and left.

That's probably a first that someone has come back to pay for something they stole after being confronted about it. It probably scared him that I had his license plate number.

Does this mean that there's more to come? The Dreaded Church Carnival is less than a month away!

Taxi, Please!

Some people never learn their lesson.  Lately I've been ringing up people that buy tons of beer that leave the store in a taxi.

Why do they do this? Because they got their license taken away and can't drive for awhile! Yet they still continue to buy beer. Is it really that important that you have to waste $20-$30 on a taxi for a ride up to the convenience store???

I guess they are at least taking a taxi instead of driving their car anyways.

Thieves, Thieves Everywhere

So many thieves lately, so little time....If you've wondered where I've been, I've been busy trying to catch all these fucking assholes stealing from our store.

We used to have these signs all over our store that said things like "Smile, you're on camera!" or "If you steal you will be prosecuted", things like that. Over the years, as the signs would rip or become worn, we would just take them down and not replace them. Lately, we've had so much theft in the store it's unbelievable. It's pretty much everyday we would find an empty package of something, or a beer bottle taken out of a six pack. I never thought those signs did anything, but apparently they do.

Last week we had some asshole come in, he was in his 20s and went straight over to our energy drinks. Our stocker thought he saw him stick a drink in his pocket, so he went and told the cashier who then kept an eye on him. She watched him while he walked around the store. Eventually he came up to the register to buy a small ice cream sandwich. She asked him to empty his pockets, he did and had nothing on him. She ended up getting his license plate anyway.

When I came in the next morning, they had left me a note telling me about what happened and to see if I could look it up on camera. I did, and saw this guy shove a Monster energy drink down one of his many pants pockets. He then went over to our one blind spot in the store and started cramming packages of Oreos and Nutter Butters in his other pockets. He must have known he was being watched because he went up to buy the ice cream to probably distract them. When he went to go pay for his ice cream, he said he left his money in the car and went to go get it. That's probably when he unloaded all the goodies from his pants, so by the time he came back in and the cashier told him to empty his pockets, they really were empty.

But like I said, the cashier got his license plate anyways so I made the call to the police that next morning. We have some really good police officers in the city, but some of them just suck. They are lazy and obviously don't like filling out reports, and whenever I call about something, we always seem to get those types in. I even get interrogated by the dispatchers like I've done something wrong.

So when the cop came in to watch our video tape, he called in the license plate and was told the car was registered to a woman in a city about a half hour away. He then basically said he probably couldn't do anything about it and that MAYBE he could ask his boss if he could drive to that city and go knock on their door. I asked him to give me the address himself and he said no.

So, if you can't do the work and I offer to do it and you say no, then this thief gets away with it? How is that fair? Is it because he only stole about $8 worth of stuff?

Sadly this happens to us a lot. Many of the thieves never get punished because law enforcement just doesn't do anything sometimes. It pisses me off. This is why so many people steal.

Maybe I should start handing cartons of cigarettes to the thieves so that brings the total of the stolen merchandise up a little more? Would anyone care then?

About a week ago we plastered the store with those "Smile, you're on camera" signs again. Strangely we haven't noticed anyone stealing.

Asking for Directions

I hate when male customers ask me for directions. As soon as they spot another penis in the store they completely walk away from me and ask the other man for directions. This happens ALL the time:

Now Hiring, Now Firing!

I always hate when we have to put up the "Now Accepting Applications" sign because of the weirdos we get applying for jobs.

We have a section on there that asks if you've ever been convicted of a crime (or something like that, I can't remember the exact wording.)

People - it doesn't help you if you lie on your application.

I do background checks on potential people we might hire. I tend to favor the people more that are HONEST about what they've gotten in trouble with before.

However, when you answer "No" to the question of ever having been convicted of a crime and you're lying, then your application pretty much goes in the garbage.

Last week was a smorgasbord of different convictions. I found one guy who has weapons charges on his record. Another who was convicted for felony theft and yet another that had MULTIPLE drug convictions - some as recent as December!

I also found that a sex offender had applied as well. Aren't sex offenders convicted of a crime if they are labeled a sex offender? Did he write it down on his application? Of course not.

Look, I understand that people probably made mistakes or are too embarrassed to put down what they've been in trouble for. I understand that even criminals need to make a living too. (Not sure about sex offenders, though. We do have a lot of teens that come into the store.)

But when the application says in big bold letters A BACKGROUND CHECK MAY BE CONDUCTED, then maybe you want to tell the truth a little.

One applicant wrote that he was convicted of a dui, but that he's been sober for 9 months. Out of all of those other applications, he's the one we are going to interview because *gasp* he told the truth!

On another note, the bottom of our application says 'DO NOT CALL REGARDING THE STATUS OF YOUR APPLICATION'.

Yet, every other day, the guy I mentioned earlier with the weapons charges is calling us every day asking about his application. He's a mean fucker, too. I've tried to tell him we are just accepting applications and not hiring just yet, but he gets mean with me and gets an attitude. I'm afraid to tell him to go fuck himself because I don't want him bringing one of those weapons in my store and shooting the place up!

Marriage, Babies and Annoying Customers

Customers have been annoying the shit out of me lately. What else is new, right?

Well, I just recently celebrated my one-year wedding anniversary and ever since I got married people have been badgering me as to when I am going to have kids.

Lately it's been getting worse. Customers come in, look directly at my stomach and yell "Is there a baby in there yet?!?!?" or some other variation of that.

I even had one lady arguing with me about why I wasn't pregnant yet. I tried giving her every excuse in the book.

Bitch customer: So when are you gonna pop out some babies???

Me: When we can afford it.

Bitch customer: What's to afford? Don't you want any kids?

Me: Well we are waiting so we don't go bankrupt or into debt or anything.

Bitch customer: Why wait? You're running out of time, you know.

Me: Thanks for calling me old, but I'm not running out of time. We just got married, I'd like to enjoy that time together right now.

Bitch customer: Oh, you can have time later on with each other. Start poppin' those babies out!

What I wanted to do was put the focus on her since she was embarrassing me in front of other customers about something that's none of her business. Since she has no problem butting into my life, I wanted to talk about how her husband is a scumbag and filed divorce papers on her out of nowhere while she was out of town visiting her dying mother. And then he decided to change his mind and take her back. Why can't we talk about that instead of why I'm not having any children?

There's another customer that comes in every other day and asks if I'm pregnant yet. So I finally told her that when I do get pregnant, she will be the first person to know.

She's like, "Well, not the first, but maybe around the 5th person." Seriously? This is also the customer that got really pissed at me because I didn't invite her to my wedding. I'M JUST YOUR CASHIER LADY. YOU ARE JUST A CUSTOMER THAT BUYS TOO MUCH LOTTERY. GO AWAY.

It's getting frustrating and I'm running out of excuses.

Anyone got anything good I could use to get these people off my back?

Dateline This Sunday

Be sure to watch Dateline this Sunday.

They are doing a special on lottery tickets and getting scammed by your cashier.

See? I TOLD you there were shitty cashiers out there that will try and steal your money if you don't know how much your lottery ticket winnings are before you bring it into the store.

Chris Hansen rules.

Craigslist Missed Connections

I don't know if any of you ever go on Craigslist, but I always go on and read the 'Missed Connections' section.

What it's for is usually if you saw someone somewhere and you thought they were cute or something, then you go on Missed Connections and put up a post on there trying to find that person.

I've waited for six years for someone from my store to be mentioned.

And it finally happened.

One of the girls that work for us is a big flirt and she will always talk to customers and ALOT of guys ask her out (girls too, but that's another story).

Anyways, these people will ask for her phone number and she will sometimes give it out. She makes plans with these people and never follows through. She'll always give some kind of excuse as to why she never called them or why she never showed up for their 'date'. People come in all the time looking for her, and it's kind of funny because it gives me drama to watch.

So i was innocently reading the Craigslist Missed Connections the other day and came across a post with our store name and the name of the employee in it. Excitedly I clicked on it.

This was a few weeks ago and it has since been deleted, but it basically went on to say that she sucked and that she never called him after they talked all summer. It then included a picture of her at the bottom of the post.

Seeing this made my whole week. AND...a few weeks later, there was ANOTHER post, probably from the same person, STILL going on about how much she sucked and that she broke their heart.

After I told her about it and laughed at her, she has seemed to calm down with the customers because I don't think she wants to be talked bad about on the Internet.

Has anyone read Missed Connections before and found themselves on it?

Foiled Again

I really don't understand people sometimes.

We had a girl come into the store the other day. She looked around awhile and then ended up leaving without buying anything. Naturally I became suspicious and went to the back of the store to see what I could find.

I found this open on the shelf:


















She had stolen a piece of aluminum foil! Now, I realize that it would be difficult to put the whole thing in your purse and take it, but why steal one small piece of it? Did she have leftovers to wrap up and ran out of foil?

So now, we have her picture up on our wall for people we need to look out for because she owes us $2 for that!

I was clueless why she would take just a small piece of foil until a coworker told me that she probably took it so that she could use it for drugs.

Now I'm really clueless. What does one small piece of foil do? Can someone enlighten me?

New Year, Same Shitty People

Happy New Year everyone!

I'm ready for 2012 to start. 2011 can suck it.

Last week I received a phone call asking for the manager.

"I'm the manager," I told this woman.

"I thought the manager's name was Steve," she said.

"That's the owner, he's my dad but he's not here right now."

"Oh, I guess you'll do. I have a complaint about one of your employees."

"Go on," I said, intrigued.

She went on to tell me how one of our employees was extremely rude to her when she was there. She said that the cashier ringing her up YELLED at her to sign her credit card slip and slammed her cigarettes down on the counter with such force that she thought the cashier broke the cigarettes inside.

Naturally I apologized and said I would reprimand the employee. I invited her to come in for a free coffee courtesy of the store and we hung up shortly after.

As usual I never really believe anything a customer says until I verify it for myself, so I immediately went to our security system and checked the date and time that this woman said she was in.

Sure enough, there she was, and there was our cashier ringing her up.

I had to watch the tape about five times to make sure, because there was NOTHING WRONG. There was no slamming of cigarettes on the counter, there was no yelling. Our cashier was even smiling at her when ringing her up!

I did notice that this lady came in with an attitude. She's the one that threw her purse down on the counter and seemed to be all pissy with the cashier. This is also a customer that I've never seen before, even though she said she's always in every morning. Bullshit. I know every morning customer and she ain't one of them.

People, if you're going to complain about one of us, make sure it happened the way you said it happened. Don't fuck around and try to get us in trouble.