Wednesday, June 23, 2010

Things I Hate: Farting Customers

The worst thing to ever happen to a cashier is when a customer farts before departing the register area.

Why? Because it lingers, it smells, and the next customer in line usually thinks it was me.

I always get strange looks from people when they think I farted. They know they can smell something, because I usually notice their noses wrinkle up, and then they'll look up at me to see if I am the guilty party. If they can't tell, they usually blame me anyways.

Why can't customers walk to the back of the store or even outside to pass gas? Why do they have to crop dust throughout the store so that the rest of us have to suffer?

Do you realize there is probably fart particles on most or all of our candy? That stuff is directly in the line of fire.

Think about that the next time you buy a Payday or Snickers. Think of who probably farted near it.


  1. omg. no more buying candy bars at the convenience store for this girl.

    Maybe you should make a little sign that says, danger will rogers, danger. customer in front of you just passed gas.

    or this would be funny, have a button that you can push that little oxygen masks fall down from the ceiling when someone farts. hahahahah

    I know, I'm delusional today.

  2. You should pre-empt the customer who follows the farter. Ask them, "Did you fart"? That way, they are saddled with having to explain away the smell!

  3. "Fart particles" LMAO! Next time just wrinkle you nose and look back at the customer!

  4. I'm with Dazee ^^ Oxygen mask all the way girl!!!

    I hate sitting up front at church...hate it...thus when I attend on Sunday mornings, I sit in the back...and there is this one woman who I dread being near...never matters what side of the building I sit on...she always manages to get in front of me when she comes...and she farts the ENTIRE time. It's like one right after another...sometimes...loudly...with no stench...and sometimes the gag factor makes me actually get up and move closer to the front.

    I wonder at times if that is a tactic by my pastor to get me to sit closer to the front??? Hmm....gonna have to ask him!

  5. I heard somewhere that people on average, inhale a liter of fart juice from vapors per year.

    Wow, not to twist the knife or anything.

    Again, hilarious.

  6. I'm never buying candy again. Yikes.

    Have a terrific, fart free day. :)

  7. That's it, I will never again pick up a candy bar at the checkout.

  8. I used to have an engineer who came in my office to talk to me for a few minutes almost every morning. He always farted and never said a word about it. No excuse me, no "oops". It totally made me feel like I was losing my mind. Who just stands there and farts loud I might add!



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