Our bathroom is forever out of order. On purpose, of course.
I can't stand it when people ask something like 'Well, how bad IS the bathroom?'
If I tell you it's out of order, that means you can't use it. End of story. Not for some people though. They want to know details about what's wrong with it, if they can fix it, if they can just use it real quick, etc. By the time they get done asking questions about it, I'm surprised they haven't peed their pants by how long they took to inquire about the bathroom.
Just once I'd like the conversation to go something like this:
Customer: Can I use the bathroom?
Me: Sorry, it's out of order.
Customer: It is? Well, is it really that bad? I mean, how bad is it? Can I still use it? I'll be fast.
Me: How bad is it? Let's see. Somebody must have let a monkey loose in there, because there is poop with corn in it smeared all over the walls. Someone also must have forgotten their glasses because there is piss all over the corner. Another person puked in the sink - we think they ate Chinese food, somebody else stuffed a bunch of bloody paper towels in the toilet and clogged that up. And oh yeah, someone else also headbutted the mirror in there. I don't think it's usable right now.
If you're wondering if any of those things have ever happened, yes they have. Just not all at once.