Tuesday, July 20, 2010

Are All Short Men Cocky?

We have this regular customer that comes in that is evil.

All he buys every day are newspapers, yet always seems to stick around and give his opinions. This guy seems to have a problem with large women, and teenagers. Every time an overweight woman comes in, he stands there and makes a big production out of staring her up and down with a disgusted look on his face. I hate when he does this, because he makes it obvious. I've told him before to stop staring, but he doesn't listen. Because he's evil. And short.

Well today the tall customer came in and this evil customer started up his usual shit. He takes one look at the tall customer and starts talking to my coworker:

Evil customer: So, Stacy, need any lightbulbs changed?

I hear this and immediately get pissed, because I'm ringing up the tall customer and can hear this asshole pretty clearly.

As usual, my coworker is clueless and keeps asking him to repeat himself, which is just making me angrier.

I'm sure this tall customer can take care of himself, but he can also choose to go to another store because of crappy comments he hears in my store. I don't want that to happen, because he's one of the few that I like.

So, after the tall customer leaves, I start yelling at this guy. I told him that he needs to stop his shit and stop making comments to customers. He of course denies doing anything, yet has a stupid smile on his face the whole time.

He then asks me how I would like a smack in the face.

I told him go ahead, because then he'd go to jail and that's where he belongs. He probably needs a jail boyfriend to set him straight. Or to make him walk a little stiffer.

Sometimes I wish I could kick or punch customers and get away with it. Or go slash their tires. Or rip his newspaper in half right in front of him. Yeah, maybe I need anger management, but I can still dream, right?


  1. One of these days he's going to get a fat woman who asks him what his f-ing problem is. I am just such a fat woman. It'll be awesome.

    Don't worry. The karma train is never late.

  2. That guy has serious issues with himself so he runs other people down to try to feel better. I'm sure you don't need anger management..you react normally to assholes!!

  3. I have to say, yes, most short men have a bad attitude complex. and they usually drive pickup trucks jacked up to heaven. Good for you telling him off. he needs a good face shaving a la mississippi burning.

  4. What an arsehole! My husband is short, but no attitude whatsoever over it. It's not that. Some people, men and women, tall and short, fat and skinny are just jerks!

  5. spill some water on the counter as he walks in and let his newspaper just sit right in that puddle when you ring him up. Yep...that's the way to go...ruin his paper...

    Sorry gal! Wish I could be there and I'd stand outside the door with my "ninja skills" and whoop the bad guys butts for you & then magically disappear so as not to get in trouble myself.

  6. Everyone has a hobby and obviously this guys is being a jerk. It's the reactions he gets to it that keeps him going. I can't believe he asked you if you wanted a smack in the face.

  7. Speaking as a 5'9" dude, which is about average height, I think we tend to be more assertive as a group. Tall guys just roll around in women, so you have to step-up and flash some personality if you want to impress someone. However, among really short dudes (like 5'5" and under), I've noticed that plenty seem to have a persecution complex.

  8. Wow and I thought being a bakery clerk was bad...you got some special ones too. Love your stories if you want please stop by my blog. I work at a grocery store and I get the cream of the crop customers. i write a lot of work stories you may like.


  9. Start making 'stumpy' and 'shorty' comments whenever he's in earshot, and the more brutal the better. I once had a little bastard come up into MY front yard and start hassling my little sister until she cried, so I laid into his ass. Sure, he was only 9, but he had it coming. (It wasn't the first offense of this kind -- far from it!! This was just the first time I caught him at it.) Fat little bitch. And when I was done, (I was told) he cried almost constantly for 3 days. And he never even so much as looked sideways at my sister ever again. People with a cruel nature simply need the 'eye for an eye' treatment...it's sad, but true. This country has gotten so ridiculously PC that it's forgotten that sometimes the customer ISN'T right. There are some things that cannot be borne, and this is one of them. =)

  10. And I am SO down with the puddle suggestion for his precious newspapers!! LOL You definitely don't need anger management...he needs an attitude adjustment like nobody's business. Keep us posted!! =)



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