Wednesday, June 30, 2010

Taking Out the Trash...

There's only one thing worse than a customer, and that one thing is: garbage juice.

I hate taking out the trash and try to do it as little as possible.

I admit that I haven't mastered the art of trash removal yet.

The things people put in trash cans are disgusting, as they should be. But it sucks when I change the garbage and get garbage juice on me.

You know what I'm talking about. It's that stuff that drips from the bag even though there's no visible hole in the bag. It's the stuff that leaves a liquid trail from the trash can until you throw it in the dumpster.

My problem is that I always manage to get garbage juice on my skin or clothes. I don't know how it happens, but it does.

And even when I'm lucky enough to not spill garbage juice on myself, it somehow manages to attach its stench to my nose hairs, which means that's all I can smell for the rest of the day.

If garbage juice wafts up to my nose, that's it for me. I'm paranoid that I smell all day long and am constantly asking customers and co-workers if I smell like garbage juice. Surprisingly not many customers know what garbage juice is.

I'd probably take crappy customers all day long over garbage juice.

Maybe I should wear a garbage bag over my clothes and put a face mask on before I take out the trash....I'll sacrifice looking like a tool if it'll save me from that smell.

9 comments:

  1. Oh hell yes. Nasty to the max. I seem to drop it on my toes mostly, which is just gross. It's possible it can melt flip flops. Anything garbage related is just gag worthy. How come no matter what's in the damn garbage it always smells exactly the same? I've been known to hold my breath for a full two minutes while yanking out the garbage bag and tieing it up. Better turning purple than dealing with the stank.

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  2. That is exactly what I was going to tell you. Get a face mask and put on a trash bag and gloves. Uuuuh, I can imagine it right now.

    Peace, Love and Chocolate
    Tiffany

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  3. Ack, garbage juice! Yes, I've dealt with that many a time and I am EXACTLY the same way when it comes to being paranoid all day about smelling like it. One time the bottom of the garbage bag ripped open a bit and garbage juice just poured out all over my feet (in flip flops) and there were frickin' MAGGOTS mixed in the juice! Squirming all over my toes! I don't think a person can imagine the true horror of that until it happens to you. I soaked my feet in a bleach-water mixture until I couldn't stand it. BLECH!!

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  4. Disgusting. I hate taking my own garbage out for that reason - and I'm SOOOO careful about no liquid or nastiness in my garbage...but somehow...there almost always is something yucky in it regardless.

    Sorry gal! Definitely buy a "suit" to wear next time!

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  5. Even worse than getting the garbage juice on you is not knowing exactly what it was from. A garbage suit would be a great idea.

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  6. Garbage juice smell mixes oh so nice with the dumpster smell...it will singe your nose hairs!

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  7. Damn Girl! I never even thought about it, but you are absolutely right! Garbage juice is the worst! Isn't there some young cashier intern you can assign this duty to?

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  8. Garbage juice is the most disgusting, unexplainable fluid ever. I swear, when I worked at Dunkin' Donuts, it would magically materialize in bags that had no liquid. It's the garbage equivalent of ants, which also materialize out of nowhere.

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  9. OMG! I don't think I've laughed this much in ages. Am stopping by from the LBS Tea Party, and so glad I did. But now I shall keep on reading more of your previous posts.

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